My son pulled a desk out of a classroom and into the hall so we could hang his posters for this week’s Student Council election. There was limited space on the wall in between the other creative signs of hopeful candidates and I wanted my son’s poster centered in a prime spot.
I’m so proud of him for putting himself out there to run, but my mama bear instincts want to protect him from feeling like a failure if his bid for Freshman Senator comes up short, and with so many eighth graders running for only two spots it will be tough. Of course as his mom I know exactly why he would be best and this would be best for him:) but I have no control (or even the right to vote)!
This issue of control, and wrestling with it, keeps popping up in seemingly every circumstance lately and sprinkled throughout multiple conversations and even in my husband’s sermon last week. I know this is not by coincidence. When this happens it is clearly God signaling for my attention.
The rhetorical question of Romans 8:31 is this: “If God is in control who can be against you?”
If the answer is no one, why do we act as our own worst enemy by pitting ourselves against God for control? Instead of trusting his provision, timing, protection and ultimately the working out of his good and perfect plan, we buck up against God’s rule in our own vain attempt to usurp his power and take control.
So on one hand I believe he is in control of all things, yet my self-talk, fear and worry convince me otherwise. How foolish, especially considering I know his character and have seen his faithfulness to me in the past (and again just last week in answering our prayers for a specific college roommate for our daughter)! But not only am I just like Eve who thought God was holding out on her, I’m like the Israelites, who over and over again decried God’s goodness and believed their ways were best.
I know we don’t think of ‘trying to control’ as sin but it is, just as our anxiety and fear can be too. This is because everytime we turn away from God and fix our eyes on self we are trying to throw off his rule to be our own god.
Most often my attempt to control comes out in the form of nagging my daughter. It’s easy to justify my constant barrage of reminders as helping her keep things from falling through the cracks. But if something does fall through the cracks or she misses an assignment or doesn’t pick up her messy room, aren’t God’s ways better? Won’t he use it to teach and grow her without my “help!”
Ugh! We are all control-freaks in some way or another. Trying to control other people, others’ opinions, circumstances, time, our day, our image, our health, food, finances, the future, an outcome… No wonder we are filled with so much anxiety!
Philippians 4:4-7 shows us another way, a better way:
“Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
There is a connection here between rejoicing in the Lord (giving thanks and finding joy) and deep-seeded peace. A connection between being level-headedness and not worrying.
Ding. Ding. Ligh bulb moment!
If this is true, our minds consumed with trying control and our hearts filled with fear keeps us from experiencing peace and joy. Which means – we need to let go of control, but how?
The answer I believe is found in what follows in Philippians 4:8-9…
“…whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things… (P)ractice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.”
Lord, help me put these things into practice by dwelling on who you are for me so that when I feel out of control I may rest in you instead of running to my own resources as a means to gain control.
Past posts on control: Turning over the Keys {Because we lack control anyway} and Control Queen Alert
