In 2015 when I wrote Face Time and 2016 when it was in the editing process, concern over social media and it’s connection to identity and mental health struggles were just beginning to surface. The information I gleaned from my teen survey in late 2014 – like the extent to which comparison via Instagram was affecting our girls – was definitely not common knowledge yet. This made me all the more eager to get the information in the book out in the marketplace!
Today things like adolescent stress and anxiety, lonliness, eating disorders, and the college hook-up culture are much more known and talked about. But in its wake, parents of younger children are more fear-filled than ever about the teen years. On the opposite end of the spectrum, many parents of teens not sure what to do about all the issues have instead just checked out.
None of us – teens and adults alike – are not not being shaped by phones, technology and the selfie world in which we live. And while no guide could ever full-proof keep our kids from struggling, I believe the message and hope offerned in Face Time: Your Identity in a Selfie World is more relevant than ever.
But what we have to get straight is the real problem is not this world, it’s our hearts bent toward the created instead of the Creator to give us what only God can. We are turning inward to self, thinking our appearance or our performance determines our worth. We buy into the lie that how pretty, skinny, smart, successful, popular, powerful, wealthy is what gives us value. But even that’s not enough, we need everyone else to notice too. Without others’ affirmation, acceptance and love we crumble under the pressure of trying to measure up and thinking we aren’t enough.
What this looks like for teens (and adults) is seeking after “likes” and comments, starving and/or abusing our bodies, pretending to be okay but secretly falling apart, tearing others down, giving into peer pressure out of fear of others’ opinions, forgoing boundaries, turning friendships into competition and on and on. And apart from the intervening worth and work of a Savior we will continue down paths of destruction and emptiness.
But Jesus incarnate changes everything. His perfection for those who are in Christ is our true identity. There is a disconnect though in seeing how the story of the Bible is what helps us understand our condition and brings us the hope and wholeness we long for. (Get Your Story Straight, anyone?)
In a very practical way with narrative fictional, but realistic stories, Face Time speaks to the hearts of girls, But I’m telling you, I need these same truths. To that I end, I believe any adult or teen guy could get as much out as teen girls from the book because our root problem is all the same.
This is why Walt Mueller, founder and President of the Center for Parent/Youth Understanding, included the book in his Identity Resource Packet.
“While the book is designed to be read by teenaged girls, I’m telling youth workers that they can teach the book’s material to both girls and guys. Kristen’s theology of identity is worth the price of the book alone, and it can serve as valuable teaching content.” – Walt Mueller
If you have not read Face Time or maybe just now have a teen — I believe Face Time is the book for you. Read it alongside your teen this summer, put together a small group to go through in the fall or suggest it to a youth leader. You can preview a sample of the book HERE. Or order, HERE.
If you or your teen has read Face Time — the best possible present you could give me this BOOK BIRTHDAY is to write an Amazon review and/or social share about the book with your friends. Online reviews and word of mouth praise are truly worth more than you know to an author! To write an Amazon review click HERE and then on Customer Reviews.
Growing together in Grace,
